threevue

I thought I had sunk to an all-time low when I decimated innocent townsfolk in order to get my 300-human-kills achievement in Fallout 3, but I was wrong.

My latest descent into damnation for cheevers came at the end of Kane and Lynch, while I was attempting to get the “Frag Out” achievement (kill 5 enemies with one grenade). In the final episode, there is a section when you are leaving a church only to be met with about a dozen bad guys at once coming up the stairs at you. It’s one of the few times where there is a concentration of enemies in one area at one time. Unfortunately, one of your teammates (Shelly) is a very nice guy and will start dropping grenades on them like it’s nobody’s business, effectively rendering your attempt at getting the cheever ineffective. I tried everything to keep him away from the bad guys, but he just wouldn’t listen to my commands.

So, I did what any person that values achievement points over human life would do – I loaded up that scene, shot Shelly in the head (several times, too, the guy doesn’t go down easy) and then dropped a grenade of my own before he could squeeze one out of his pocket. Cheever popped on the first try. Don’t worry, I healed Shelly up right as rain immediately afterward, and he wasn’t mad or anything. But that doesn’t change the fact that I felt like a royal douche for doing it.

Oh well, that’s 20 points closer to Tyler’s gamerscore!