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Cleaning House is where we post some of the game reviews/articles that for one reason or another, we never posted. Instead of just letting the hundreds of words we wrote gather cobwebs, we’re putting them out in their current format. Better late than never!

Mark

It’s interesting to think about how much was content was put on to a single disc for this game. All the missions, side missions, side-side missions, voice acting, character animations, and so on, are all amazing. And to think, there are games out there like Avatar: The Last Airbender, that are about as deep as a sheet of paper.

The only real complaint that I can come up with GTA4 is how repetitive it is. Drive here, shoot these guys, do it again, then do it again. That’s not really a complaint with this individual game, though, but with the series as a whole. We knew what we were getting into when we started it.

94/100

Russ
Like the other GTA games before it, I can almost guarantee that I won’t finish this title. Matter of fact, I gave this game a few hours, just enough time to get a feel for and appreciate everything it had to offer, and nonchalantly decided to play a different game. And there’s the rub. This game got so many things right – the intricacies of human interaction (now with dating!), a mostly true-to-life feel, and bowling – but these are all things I can experience while playing this other game I like to call real life. In other words, I play games to shoot monsters, rock out in front of a million fans, or explore fantasy worlds. The thought of delivering drugs and shooting random people that may or may not deserve it doesn’t quite float my boat.

I respect the game, and I think that it’s 100% my fault for not playing it. That and I’m not good at video games in general, so when I have to restart a mission because I messed it up, only to find that I have to drive across town just to get things rolling again, I’m turned off. It’s not you, Rockstar, it’s me, but either way you made an awesome game that I’ll probably never play.

82/100

Tyler

Last month I, like most of you out there I’m sure, popped GTA4 in to my chosen current-gen gaming console for the first time, cracked open a frosty Ecto Cooler and sank in to my luxurious fox and mink skin lined davenport sofa with a grin, prepared for some serious time on the streets of LC. As excited as I was to see how fun this game was going to be, my shadenfreudenistic side was waiting to seize on the first of many colossal fuck ups that I was sure were waiting just past the title screen. I chalk this up to my recent disappointments in gaming, but that’s for another time. I’m kind of a completest but I never played a GTA for the story or to get to the end, only for the ‘splosions. So I was worried about committing to a game that is known for being much played but often unfinished. I’m happy to say that GTA4 delivered on almost all fronts.

There are moments in the game when you forget just how grand Grand Theft Auto is. Then you call up Brucie and hit the skies in a chopper and you are met with a view of what can only be described as the best simulation of a living breathing city anyone has seen to date. The graphics were top notch, the story was compelling, the acting was true, the city was teeming with people and I had a genuinely great time with the game. It’s kind of difficult to encompass all of the good things about GTA4 in a review, If you’ve played it then you know what I mean. For some strange reason it’s easier to point out it’s flaws. With a game as epic in scope as this, it’s really easy to understand how the loss of fine controls can happen. Jacking a taxi instead of getting in as a passenger can utterly ruin a long mission when you’re almost at the end of it, resulting in a long, boring and angry replay. Getting in the wrong car, shooting at enemies who are already dead (or non-combatant civilians) and the wide, slushy plodding of Niko errantly trying to wind his way up a spiral staircase is enough to make me bite my controller in half. Also, everyone has melty-wax faces a la Bioshock. But, I’m not mad at Rockstar. They did too much awesomeness to be bashed for a few nagging trivialities.

90/100